INTRODUCTION:

It is interesting how there are a whole bunch of people in our society who claim to be counsellors, but in actual fact, are far from it. From parents to teachers, clerics, bosses at work, Doctors and nurses and indeed anyone who occupies a position of influence have at one time or the other played the role of counsellor.

In life, we would all need someone reliable to talk to when challenges come. Someone that can lead and give the right directions when we are not in the position to do so.

What most people do however, cannot be professionally termed counselling. It sometimes achieve a desirable end, however a lot of people in authority actually play the role of advisers as opposed to counsellors. And it is not unusual for such a person to be upset or feel slighted when their advice are not taken.

The role of a counsellor therefore, cannot be overemphasized. Individual in position of influence will all do well in taking basic counselling courses. This way, they will be better positioned to positively influence others to take the right steps.

My orientation about counselling and counsellors in general has completely changed. I am glad I chose to take this course and look forward to changing the world through my role as a counsellor.

OBJECTIVES:

Over the years, I find that people come to me seeking for advice in marital issues. I attend a youth church, so I (now in my early forties) am one of the few older people in church. Most of these young people would flock to me with what I believe to be the usual teething problems of marriage and all they want is out. By God’s grace, I have learnt to successfully prevail over them, but I also wanted to be sure I wasn’t misguiding anyone. 

I also felt that I was put in that position for a reason, and I might as well make the most of it. I strongly believe that whatever is worth doing at all is worth doing well. I wanted to be at my best even when counselling informally. I was sure I was missing out some things and I felt a great need to understand what I was missing out on. I wanted to be the best at what I do and I figured out that there is so much I do not know. 

Ultimately, I am glad I enrolled for the course because as soon as I did, I realised how much counselling mistakes I have made in the past. I am better equipped to counsel younger people now than I was before I took the course, my main objective for taking this course is to help marriages survive.

UNDERSTANDING AND APPLICATIONS:

Each module was carefully put together with the intention to help the counsellor recognise, resolve and help couples improve their relationships. If the learnings are properly applied, the counsellor assist couples in making thoughtful decisions that can help strengthen their relationship.

The Relationship, marriage and family counselling modules were very enlightening indeed. Right from module one where I was introduced to the subject matter. This module also touched on basic skills a family counsellor needs to possess. Such skills as attending, probing questions, genuineness and reflective listening. A counsellor will do well in paying attention to these skills in other to get the best out of a counselling session.

Module 2 here touched on addressing common issues in relationship marriage and family counselling. The list of issues that could come up in a marriage are inexhaustible. This module is quite instruction on addressing common issues in marriage counselling ; such as physical abuse, problems with sex and romance, blended family issues, infidelity, intellectual and cultural differences. This module helps the counsellor understand this problems in relation to family counselling and how to help the family navigate the period.

In module 3, I learnt about couples counselling theories and models. Amongst the lot, the Gottman theory is my favourite. This is because it combines therapeutic interventions and couples exercises to help couples identify and address the natural defences that hinder communication and bonding.

Module 4 focuses on the concept of clinical family counselling and we touched on some leading figures in clinical couple and family counselling. Some of them are Nathan Ackerman, Murray Bowen, Philip Guerin, Betty Carter, Carl Whitaker, Virginia Satir and Jay Haley.

Module 5 was very enlightening for me. It discusses in details sexual and intimacy issues in family counselling. It is interesting to know that sex is very important in any marital relationship. Sometimes, couple might need help with addressing intimacy issues and other related matters. A marriage counsellor need to be well equipped for such situation.

The sensitive issue of separation and divorce was the subject of discuss in module 6. As counsellors, one’s objective is to help couples stay married, but ultimately, it is not the decision of the counsellor. A marriage counsellor will help a couple have a seamless divorce / separation if that is their decision. Also a counsellor will try to help them consider staying together, if there is any possibility for that. 

Modules 8 and 9 shed light on Relationship dynamics in family counselling and support system in family relationship respectively.

The last module teaches about treatment plans and its importance in counselling. I was also exposed to the different types of plans, how to write treatment plans and factors to consider in writing a good treatment plan.

In all, the introduction to a new way of thinking and counselling has added a lot more value to my person, and made me more professional in my dealings. I certainly look forward to learning more.

CONTINUOUS PROFFESIONAL DEVELOPMENT:

I intend to further pursue my career as a professional counsellor. I plan to take more courses in other to broaden my horizon. I plan to take up volunteer counselling opportunities. I will be happy to see people live happy and fulfilling lives because I was part of their stories.

LIMITATIONS OF THE SYSTEM

In my opinion, the first major limitation I see in the system is the fact that people are not yet very open to talking to therapist and counsellors. There are a lot of lay counsellors giving misguided advises and misleading people. 

Also I understand that people need to make money off their counselling skills after spending so much to undergo the trainings. It would be beneficial however for the institute to organise for volunteer counsellors who do not mind working pro bono to attend to people who cannot afford to pay to see a counsellor. 

With the rate of suicide among out teens and young adults, I think the school system also need to be integrated into the counselling schemes,

CONCLUSION

For me, this has been a very important learning curve. I can boldly counsel in a professional manner without any fear of error. I am glad I took this course, and I cannot wait for the world to benefit from it. – Kola Adewale Olatunbosun

-Counseling System Progress Report CSPR is one of the prerequisite for graduation at the Institute of Counseling in Nigeria